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Lock, Stock and Cracker Barrel

Brooklyn may be the new land of plenty for national retail chains, but at least one corporate giant won't be setting up shop anytime soon. Yes, we're talking about Cracker Barrel, that legendary Tennessee restaurant chain that offers a deeply sanitized, ersatz version of down-home, old-timey culinary goodness.

Brooklyn residents won't be getting a chance to sample the Barrel's soggy biscuits or purchase a rocking chair from its dee-lightful "general store" anytime soon, because, surprise, the company has a history of attracting lawsuits for its alleged poor treatment of blacks, women and gays (ribs just don't taste the same without a little segregation, y'all.)

What makes this story particularly remarkable is that Cracker Barrel had no interest in moving to the largely farm-free borough until Borough President Marty Markowitz extended a special invite to the chain. That's right. At some point he walked into Marty walked into a Cracker Barrel (517 stores in 41 states), and thought something like, "Brooklyn could use some of these John Deere hats and pecan logs." (We suppose the hipsters in Williamsburg could have used the hats.) Though Markowitz rescinded the invite after learning about the store's checkered past, the whole affair still doesn't add up. Rumor has it that Marty actually meant to invite the much more useful urban home giant Crate and Barrel to Brooklyn, which really, would have made a lot more sense.